Google+ Authentic Parenting: Parenting Myth Busted: They Never Stop Breastfeeding on their own

Friday, August 31, 2012

Parenting Myth Busted: They Never Stop Breastfeeding on their own

Welcome to the August edition of Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival: Breastfeeding.
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival hosted by The Positive Parenting Connection and Authentic Parenting. As August is Breastfeeding awareness month, our participants are writing about this exact subject! Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

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Even though I always knew I would nurse my daughter, I had never considered the duration of this nursing relationship. Back then, I hadn't heard about child led weaning, and 'extended' breastfeeding was something that was only done by strange hippy people...

Guess what, I have become one of those moms and with my daughter now 4 years and 2 months old, we are still nursing. I nursed through pregnancy and continued tandem nursing both my kids after giving birth to our Little Buddha.

Pretty quickly - about when she got over a year - we got silly remarks on breastfeeding from family, friends and even complete strangers. One of the silliest ones, and probably the one we heard the most was: "She'll never stop nursing".

So here's our little story to the day, just to show you that yes, kids do wean on their own, and no, I'm not going to be nursing her the day she leaves for college...

Nursing both kids in the early weeks
Even though my daughter was still nursing on a daily basis up to the birth of her little brother, the days following his birth made it difficult to continue this, and gradually, she started nursing less and less.
It's become so rare that I find myself asking her if she doesn't want to nurse anymore, from time to time. This while I was actively discouraging her in the months after Buddha's birth! Now, she nurses maybe once a week, if she accidentally lands next to my bare breasts. And soon, the last time we nursed may be the actual last time.
I will probably miss nursing my child once she is done, but I won't have been hard, as it just came when it had to come.

Child led weaning does work. It is a gentle process where both parties get to decide without artificial boundaries or age marks. It is a process where the tight, almost fusional bond between mother and child doesn't get hacked through, but gradually becomes looser.





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APBC - Positive Parenting Connection and Authentic ParentingVisit The Positive Parenting Connection and Authentic Parenting to find out how you can participate in the next Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival! Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:


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8 comments:

  1. I never thought my son would give it up on his own either... But since his 4th bday last month, he suddenly started skipping. The last time was 7 days ago now. I have no other nursling, so safe to say my milk is gone now. I feel such peace and pride. No tears, but such a sense of accomplishment that I DID IT. we made it. :) just wanted someone to share my joyful news with, since no one even knew we were still nursing after 2. :)

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    1. What a beautiful comment, thank you for sharing.
      I still nurse my 2yr old twins up to 5times a day but we do it less and less in public and speak of it less to people now, just a select few; not out of embarrassment or experience of negative comments, it's just become a more private part of our relationship now that they don't 'need' it as often and can get through more experiences of the day without topping up.

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  2. I never thought my son would give it up on his own either... But since his 4th bday last month, he suddenly started skipping. The last time was 7 days ago now. I have no other nursling, so safe to say my milk is gone now. I feel such peace and pride. No tears, but such a sense of accomplishment that I DID IT. we made it. :) just wanted someone to share my joyful news with, since no one even knew we were still nursing after 2. :)

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  3. Lovely post and photo. I'm an advocate of child led weaning as well (though my own son weaned himself around one year). Glad you you continued doing what you knew was best for your children and family :)

    Happy to participate in the carnival this month!

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  4. So well said. It was such a gentle, gradual process with my older daughter, too. I had thought night nursing would be the last to go, but in reality: During the day she would walk up for a few seconds of milk, as if she was just making sure my breasts were still there.

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  5. Lovely picture!
    And just wanted to say a general thanks to your blog, I am learning a lot from it!

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