Google+ Authentic Parenting: “Do as I Do” List

Thursday, December 9, 2010

“Do as I Do” List

written by Diane Janis

Image: lowjumpingfrog on Flickr
My suggestion is to make a “do as I do” list. Think about the values you believe are important for your children to learn. Start compiling a list and put it on the refrigerator. Then, start with the first thing on your list and observe yourself for a couple of days… Are your behaviors modeling this value that you think is important for your children to learn? If so, put a check next to it and move on to the next thing on your list. If not, do some problem solving and try to determine probable causes and solutions. Check the list daily and continue to add to it as time passes. It’s a process, but a rewarding one for everyone in the long run. Children allow us to see ourselves in a way that no others can. You’ll find that both you and your children will continue to grow as individuals who have self-respect and respect for others.

Here are just a few examples to think about:

Value: Do you want your children to value the importance of being respectful of others by learning to use “indoor” voices when it is appropriate to do so?
Behavior: However, do you find yourself yelling out requests and/or the names of family members in your own home?
Solution: It takes patience to stop what you are doing and walk over to someone to speak to him or her instead of yelling from where you are. It also gives you an opportunity to give a hug, kiss, high-five, or pat on the back… benefits of communicating face-to-face. (Add patience to the list!)

Value: Do you want your children to value the importance of being respectful to others by learning to be punctual?
Behavior: However, do you too often find yourself running late?
Solution: Be realistic about how long it takes you to do things and plan to leave enough time to calmly get to meetings, appointments, friend’s homes, etc. on time. Becoming more punctual involves both the self-discipline of not getting sidetracked with unnecessary endeavors when you are expected somewhere at a certain time and the willingness to overlook unfinished chores to get where you need to be. (Add self-discipline and adaptable to the list!)

Value: Do you want your children to be confident and have self-respect?
Behavior: However, do you find yourself speaking negatively about yourself in front of them? … Whatever criteria you use to criticize yourself, children will most likely use those criteria to criticize themselves as well.
Solution: Put conscious effort into focusing on your positive attributes and avoid complaining about your failures. (Add positive attitude to the list!)

Diane Janis is the author of the “Earth’s Secret” children's series. Her books and learning activities teach science, astronomy, and environmental awareness through fantasy literature while encouraging problem, creativity, and a positive attitude. Diane Janis holds a Bachelor of Science Degree in Elementary Education and a Master’s Degree in Education. She was an elementary classroom teacher for fifteen years, an elementary theater arts director, a “Peer Leadership” presenter, and forever and foremost remains... a parent. She is currently visiting schools for author assemblies and personalized classroom visits while writing the next novel of the “Earth’s Secret” series and excitedly awaiting the birth of her first grandchild.


1 comment:

  1. Excellent! Thank you for yet another thought-provoking and wise post.


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