Google+ Authentic Parenting: Out With The Negative... In With The Positive

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Out With The Negative... In With The Positive

As parents, we all get to deal with comments about our children and the way they are raised. When these comments are negative, they never fail to hurt us. No matter how strong one is as a person, negative remarks about your child's behavior or their upbringing sting. They make us wonder if we are failing as a parent, if maybe what we are doing might not be the best choice after all. Even if we're really secure about our parenting choices, destructive criticism stings.
However, when we get a compliment about our child's behaviour, more often than not, we attribute it to the child itself. We say it's genes or character, that our child is amazing.

Why is it that we don't accept merit and always experience defeat? Why does the negative always outweigh the positive?

Your child being well behaved is as much your merit as it is its own. Accept the compliments, and reject the negativity. It's not even a matter of weighing the positive against the negative.
You are the only one who can judge your parenting. You are the only one who gets to mae the choices and own them.
If you are made to feel insecure by comments, mayne it's time to evaluate your parenting. If you are convinced that you are doing the right thing, ban the negative, if not, work on it.

Image: wadem on Flickr

But cherish the positive too.

There is no one true path in parenting, there is only a journey. As long as you are moving ahead and learning from your mistakes and contemplating your parenting behaviour, you are doing a good job.


1 comment:

  1. There is a lot of negativism out there. As parents we do need to be secure in the way we choose to parent. Parenting is a journey. Every child is different.

    Because each child is different I can not parent each of my children the same way. When I say I can not parent in the same way I mean regarding the details. I can parent in the same way when observed from the principles of how I parent.

    If we as parents are secure in our principles (the overriding approach we take) to our parenting we will be able to handle the negativism better I do believe. At least that is my experience.

    And yes, we should accept the compliments when they occur!


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